give me a hug.

*Saturday, December 31, 2005

2005 in summary :)

since i only started last june, i copied the first and last lines of every month:)

it's getting worse.
pakasaya lang kayo ha.
sandy,miggy,michael and jai decide to eat dinner at Katips.
i see everything as an illusion.
i made you smile.
i don't want this entry to be a bad reminder.
i'm pathetic.
could someone please make me a layout?
my head's aching from all the idleness.
Good night dear sweet novembers.
geog 1 ko today.
i think i need not post about last night.

*Tuesday, December 27, 2005

To: c,k,i,a,j,g,m,j,g,a,e,s,p

i think i need not post about last night. so what's this?
everyone posted stuff about it na. haha.
takes the mystery away.

sorry.
thank you.
let's do it again.
:)

*Sunday, December 25, 2005

el cielo esta cayendo!

the eve was crap in the crappiest sense.
imagine a to-the-death match between you and your brother.
champagne went flying over the table.
he snapped.
monster.
we are the Munsters.
crap.
and a nun visited us Christmas day.
well. atleast rocky came over.
and Chicken Little makes it all better.

HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE :)

or better yet, in joey's realistic words

HAVE A NOT SO MERRY CHRISTMAS ;)

*Saturday, December 24, 2005

a friendster rant.

there are anti-friendster people on friendster. diddya know that?
there are those self-righteous non-conformists who say that friendster is for losers, yet have their own accounts.

Friendster is for the friendless, i agree, most of the time. I'm talking about those people who'll add up anyone, any group,any place,anything. It's pathetic to have forty plus accounts of people you don't know (prolly dominated by perverts and d.o.m.s) then create exclusive accounts that don't turn out to be so exclusive. i'm not mad, ok? :)

i'm ranting about friendster cause reading ross' article on conforming non-conformists reminded me of it.

i have multiple accounts. i admit. three's enough for me. one for new friends, mostly college people. one for old friends, mostly highschool people from sanago. and one for older friends,prolly from my childhood and/or maksci. oh. and i do include enemies, i'm just not making an account especially for them, prissy exes ni rocky. haha :)
i don't mean to be hypocritical or defensive. i'm being unbiased.

i salute those who have thousands of friends but don't turn their testimonials area into message boards. there are message boards for that. forkin FRONTIN bull crap.

i irk that some people are sooo self righteous to say that multiple accounts are a waste of web space. puhlease. it's those unused friendless accounts that are a waste of web space.
but lets not generalize, shall we? i'd consider those filled with sparkling piczo words, like sexy, gorgeous, cute, as a waste. i'd prolly include those that are over flowing with embeded videos, and .mp3s, in the waste bin, cause they're too sloooow. basically, if it's too boring or too much of a hassle to open, it's a waste.

let me insert this line. you can't face the problem if the problem is your face. if that's the case, it's also a waste. i'm a fan of the okrayables and the 5 volumes of friendster atrocities. sorry. i totally agree, but let's not wipe them out just yet. they're super funny :)
but hear this. don't mistake my flamboyance for apathy. i firmly believe that
no amount of plastic surgery can cure hideousness. only humility can do that.

moving on.speaking of web space. i'm taking geog this sem and cyber space is recognized as part of it. really. so i'm kinda glad that i've occupied quiet a few gigabytes, ironic as that may sound, of it.

i have life out of cyber space. don't worry. i have happy horse. jiyeah ;)

i heard it. did you?

i heard it again.
one-of-the-boys
was that a compliment?
no matter.
i'm taking it as one :)

i heard it again.
where's your boyfriend?
wish i knew. kasama ko kanikanina lang.
open relationship.
maybe i should just record it and play it over and over again :)

i heard it again.
what's the point?
does there have to be one?
if you insist.
i love him. he loves me. we just want to be :) ~~oh really?~~ <-- shut up!

i heard it again.
anything is possible.
not for me.
it's all just probable.
and more often than not, the odds are against me :) why are you still smiling?

i heard it again.
you're flat.
like i don't face the mirror everyday
and tell that to myself
and laugh :)

i heard it again.
perv magnet
please stop it.
what do i have to do?
look uglier? cries :) and yet you still manage to smile.

i heard it again.
party girl
yeah. and all of the above.
why'd you still want MY life?
you're not getting it. it's mine :)

i heard it again.
life is a roller coaster.
i've been riding it so many times. not that i've ever gotten off and died
i feel like hurling now.
but not at you. i promise :)

i heard it again.
i love you.
aww.
i know.
i love you too :)

*Sunday, December 18, 2005

i lost my baby

it's not the same anymore.
it'll never be the same.
i've grown too attatched to it.
i wanna cry
but nothing comes out.
i want to bleed
but it's not worth it.
instead, i smile.
smile smile smile
just like before
but it's not the same anymore.
i look twice as stupid.
i'll grow twice as bored.
it meant so much to me.
i hearted so many with it.
i laughed,teared,fell with it.
i abused it
and it just took and took and took.
i feel so empty without it.
it's like i lost an arm.
i wanna cry.
it hurts.
then i find myself indifferent.
like it didn't and wouldn't burden anyone.
i'm so friggin extremes.
empathic.
apathetic.
other people look more depressed about it than i do.
i'd jump and smile and joke about it.
i'd laugh and talk and scream about it.
unbelievable
i'm one of the most heartless people sometimes.
yet
i feel happy
for i sprayed and was sprayed wildly,
i slept so soundly
and my heart loved warmly.
and i found myself smiling again
deep inside just like the last time.

good bye dear phone. rocky lost his phone too. we're soo meant to be. haha :)
i will never lose hope
just like i always do.

i lost my baby.
can i have you?
will you now hug me?

hello new old phone.
hello once again once again.

*Friday, December 16, 2005

b-e-autiful :)

it's an interspecie love story. ick. haha.
icy, ceej, kaye and i watched kingkong at gateway before going to the lantern parade.
i say interspecie wrestling should be an olympic sport. haha. super funny.
and the capt. gustav is soo hott :)
did i just say hott??
that means.

I'M BAACK!

yep. i'm back. the ehemehem sandy is back. happy as can be.
alive and kicking and kicking and kicking and kicking... (joke ni jake ;p)

since absinth tayo this christmas vacation, dalawang magkasunod na post para sa inyo.
haha. i'll miss the goodah times. i'll miss you all :)

siiiiilent niiiiiight hooooly niiiiight - be boys choir

yeah. yeah. masyado na kong nalululon sa drogang toh. i know. haha. droga eh noh? puff puff.
feeler na ba? honestly?
Beta Epsilon Fireworks Display.
i got a stiff neck from the 30 minutes of it.
nambabae nanaman lahat. haha. basta masaya kayo. cadillac tayo ;p
Beta Epsilon Christmas Party.
good food. good company. good entertainment. haha. pano ba ko napadpad dito?
the girls were so nice and friendly. sanay nanaman ang lahat sa aking flamboyant nature.
di na nakapagtataka na nakakausap ko agad sila. right? :)
probinsyana, di ka pa nakakapunta dito noh? haha. boo you.
since uber feeler mode ako. todo ko na.

"betanettes sa harap ng picture!"
"sinong boy mo here?wala ah.friend lang.ah "friend".haha...lahat kami boys niya..."

see? i'm back. in uber feeler mode. proud of it.

salamat sa mga naghahatid sakin pauwi.
salamat sa mga nagpapatext at nagpapatawag.
salamat sa mga namimigay at nanlilibre :)

inspite of all the barahan and kalibugan
i laff you all <3

*Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Maskipaps + -

hinarass ng lesbian stripper
nanuod ng nakakapagpatindigbalahibong hubad na fashion/faction show
nalaglag ang lampang mapagpanggap na macho
pinakilala ang crush ko sa magagandang babae
naligo sa ulan para sa panunuod ng mga modelo
naligo sa ulan para sa mahal kong mga kuya
napuno ng putik sa paa
gininaw at niyakap
gininaw sa pagkaarbor ng astig na jacket
naglaro ng walkie talkie
nakipaggaguhan sa walkie talkie
nagkaroon ng alitan dahil sa gaguhan
iniwan sa ere ang walang kwentang tupperware
naglaro ng hide-and-seek
nakipaggarapalan sa walang kwentang tupperware
pinabayaan itsismis ng walang kwentang tupperware
humithit ng sandamukal na yosi
nagpakipot sa alak
uminom ng absinthe nang walang laman ang tiyan
kumanta ng walang katuturan
kumanta hanggang sa wala nang maibubuga
pare kung umasta
pinanatiling may sablay ang pagkasumbrerong itsura
binayaran ang utang na tambay
nangolekta ng souvenirs
natulog ng nakaupo sa kahoy na sofa
natulog ng nakahiga sa kahoy na sofa
nag-share ng talent
hindi pumayag na sumayaw
hindi natulog
7am na kakauwi lang
naghintay nang may ngiti sa bibig at kumukulong tiyan
naglantad ng kwentong-buhay
nanlambing
nambola
tumakbo
bonding
kwentuhan
halkhakan
ngitian
tunay na pagkakaibigan

I HAD A GREAT TIME :)

I HEART AND THANK YOU ALL <3

kaye.icy.ange.ceej.pau.bern.pisay.carlo.gap.chet.alfred.lito.romel.ren.
james.marlon.mikey.rachelle.jake.marco.ross.kambal.julius.anna.lhaydi.
chinkee.nikki.be.ls.carmen.karen.pau.viv.va.jaspie.jake.ponks.migo.carlo.jol.
rielle.carlos.kristia.diane.maan.diuvs.jano.rocky.

sa wala jan. miss ka na ni sandy :)

*Monday, December 12, 2005

carless oval

wow.
napatulala nalang talaga ako.
ang sarap pala sa up pag wala yung mga ikot at toki.
naglakad kami sa gitna ng daanan.
saya.
may tiangge pa.
nakahanap pa ko ng chocolate yoshi.
wow.
haha.
na-sprayan ko si kaye and icy ng fake pink snow kanina.
haha.
ang lala.
sorry guys.
one more day.
yes!
kaso gaga ako.
di nanaman nakapasok.
bat di niyo ko gisingin Lord?
yes.
sabaw mode ako.
sa friday na yung grand inuman.
gusto ko magsaya nang magsaya.
ay kay guwapo gyud nimo.
kaso drained na ang akong libido.
malibog ako.
gago bisaya yan.
meaning nalilito ako.

hug nalang.
masaya na ko.
solve na.

wednesday's supposed visitors: meia,rocky,jano
see you!

oblation run na sa thursday.
sana makita ko sila.
pati sa saturday.
break naman nun eh :)

*Saturday, December 10, 2005

empty libido syndrome

OLE OLE OLE OLE! CAMPEONES CAMPEONES!

sandycarlo,darylsakitulo,ponksmigo,sandyjake,sandybasag,jackoahole,yellowsubmarine,jakebengadaryl

just got back from the yellow submarine yellow submarine yellow submarine.

viv and i have come to these conclusions regarding my asexual period.
it's either "ang bagal mo." is now my line, because most of them are just too slow,torpe or immature.
or
it's because i hang out with enzo, another asexual being, and/or the guys too much, that i don't find them hott anymore.

it's come to the point that my "kilig ako." is fake.
i've lost my remaining penchant that even remotely resembles good taste.
worst of all, i have no regrets regarding "super hott" jake.

this is so sad.
what the f*ck is wrong with me?

haaay.will go with karen,carmen,pau and viv na muna.

i love you viv!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

*Thursday, December 08, 2005

you're not the backbone of mfy. period.

my system's in a confused state right now.
i need to rest because it's 6am. normal people are either still sleeping or waking up already.
yes. no one ever said i was normal.

why am i still up?
i'm nocturnal. that's one.
it's smoker's night later. i might have nightmares. that's two.
my head's full of bullshit. that's three. and that's just plain disgusting.

define bullshit.
if i could, this would be it.

Oi, may nabalitaan ako syo
ah.. Tsktsk! Bsta may smthng dw na nakalagay sa
frndstr m. Abt sa hndi kna virgin.. Kumakalat ata -KAT
Y.

[copied the exact message from my phone. word per word. dot per dot. in 1:1 correspondence]

now that is, was, and forever will be bullshit.
BULL-SHIT.

why?
the person. that's one.
our supposed founder who, for sooo many months, only made paramdam when she needed some cash or a ride. the person who asked my boyfriend out soo many times, without my permission. the person who told another person that she loved and wanted her; then hid from the girl's barkada, who hunted her down.the person who would just text you out-of-the-blue when she hears rumors about you from another person just like her. the person who, despite all the bullshit she's done, even has the nerve to say...

Ah.. Kc umabot k lilane un..
So nung katxt ko c lilane,
binalita niya sakin. Pag
sabihan dw kta. Newaiz,
musta? San b ung party ni
viv n wat tym? Chka anu
su2ot?

oh my gawd! of all the people? it's the one i was looking for for jo-e! wag nalang!
of all the people? they have the nerve to say pagsabihan dw kta?
of all the people? these dirty school-less self-righteous bisexual rumourmongers have the nerve na pagsabihan ako?

KADIRI!

lahat lahat. yung sinabi,yung nagsabi,yung nagsabi sa nagsabi,yung naisip sabihin, at, pinaka-malupit, yung naisip! lahat!

w.a.f! eh ni hindi mo nga ko pinagsabihan eh! which depletes the purpose of you texting me in the first place! kasalanan ko pa ba kung tatangtanga kayong magbasa? if you have nothing good to say, go away! maghanap ka muna ng school at tumigil sa paghahabol sa mga babae! huwag mong hintayin na pagsabihan ka naming LAHAT, because we agree upon this.

so why am i posting all this so blatantly?
for the very same reason na nilaglag kita.

it's
BULL-SHIT.

and you were the ones who assumed i was this blatant.

*Wednesday, December 07, 2005

guwapo noh?

breechy as mr. cupido

haha

salamat (:

survey lang. ilaglag na ang sarili. hi mama ; )

BASAG o_O

ilang basag pics...apir!

I. Beer
1.do you drink?~ ugh. oo naman.
2.when was the last tym u drank?~ hmm.kanikanina lang.
3.umiinom ka ba ng gin?~ di ko kaya pure. di ako tigas eh.
4.have you drank vodka?~ yerp. delicious.
5.cnong nagturo syo uminom?~ i was born that way. pwede ring tatay ko.
6.nalasing ka na ba?~ oo. tao lang. besides, isn't that the point of drinking? (:
7.anong favorite song mo pag nag-iinom ka?~ crush-mandy moore. malandi ako eh. haha.
8.nagsuka ka na ba sa inuman?~ i'm infamous for it. haha.
9.tamang age para pwde nang uminom?~ 7 sa enzoland. yey!
10.fave drink mo?~ raspberry vodka cruiser. bano ako. i'm just a cruiser.
11.chaser ng empi?~ coke. simple. yummy.
12.umuwi ka na bang gumagapang dahil sa kalasingan?~ di lang. dead weight pa. binuhat ng 2 ma-ma O_o
13.sino ang madalas naghahatid sayo pag lasing ka na?~ wala. di ako umuuwi. haha. pwede ring si kash.
14.ano yung craziest thing na ginawa mo nung lasing ka?~ ay. shite. iba na toh. SECRET. or pwede ring patrick cuison. alam niyo na yun.
15.nkakailang bote ka ng beer?~ strong ice, di ko alam. redhorse, 5 lang.
16.san mig light strong ice o red horse?~ wow. parang kakasagot ko lang. red horse forever.
17.hard drinks o beer lang?~ hard kahit hindi ako tigas. sosyal ako eh. haha.
18.umminom ka ba sa bar?~ oo nalang.
19.mahal noh?~ oo! apir tayo jan! todo rip-off!
20.sa pulutan.. sisig o bopis?~ sisig. yummy. droole O_o
21.mani o chicha?~ chichuh w/ suka. lalo kang susuka.
22.pag umiinom ka ng beer.. sa bote o sa baso?~ bote. hindi daw feminine. paki ko? peace tayo (: 23.nalabasan ka na ba ng alak sa ilong?~ aray. di pa. try ko ha.
24.naaksidente ka na ba dahil sa kalasingan?~ define aksidente. yun nalang. aray.
25.nasabi mo na ba sa sarili mo na hindi ka na iinom?~ oo naman. lalo na pag kaka suka lang.

II.Yoshi
1.do you smoke?~ what? ah..oo.
2.when was the last tym u smoked?~ kanikanina lang. yosi break.
3.nakailang stick ka nun?~ di ako chain smoker. 5 ayos na.
4.anung brand ng yosi mo?~ dati gudang menthol. kaso may asbestos daw. ack. kaya capri muna ako ngayon.
5.Cnong nagturo syo mag-yosi?~ ay. laglagan na ba toh? pwede tatay ko nalang din.
6.average stick in a day?~ 5 nga.
7.menthol? lights? red?~ baog na kungh baog ah. menthol. presko eh.
8.wet smoker ka ba?~ oo. heehee. sanay pero wet. galing ko talaga.
9.legal ka ba sa bahay?~ HINDI
10.tamang age para pwde nang mag-yosi?~ 13. basta -teen na. importante ang baga.
11.what age ka nag-start mag-yosi?~ what do you mean nag-start? binigyan ako nung driver nung 5 ako. tuloytuloy na ko since 15. (pwede pakiintindi yung sagot ha.)
12.bakit ka nag-yosi nun?~ masaya ako na depressed.
13.kaya mo ba na walang yosi sa inuman?~ hindi. bakit ba talaga?
14.e sa banyo?~ oo naman. di talaga ako nagyoyosi sa banyo.
15.e sa coffee shop?~ hmm. ngayon medyo hindi na. lecheng starbucks yan. g4.
16.san ang bilihan mo ng yosi?~ sa ilalim ng overpass. sa tapat ng up lib.
17.mahal ba?~ sulit.
18.nakakaubos ka ba ng 1 pack sa isang araw?~ ako lang mag-isa? hindi ah! hihi.
19.lagi ka bang may stock ng yosi sa bahay?~ nakakabaliw. i know. pero hindi.
20.kaya mo bang itigil ang pag-yosi?~ oo. will power! "i can,but i won't." haha. wtf?!
21.nagsisisi ka ba na nagstart ka pa mag-yosi?~ hindi pa sa ngayon. wag naman sana. huhuhu :'(

*Tuesday, December 06, 2005

1 message received

so late na daw siya umuuwi ngayon kasi

"kasama ko pa si jp. nagsmoke lang kami..."

ugh.
wow.
kaya pala marami ka nanamang tricks.

i'm glad. atleast ngayon, hindi mo na ko 'mahihipokrito'.
i just don't get it if you're going up or down.
naguguluhan ako sa mga goal mo sa buhay.
hahaha. nagsalita.
gaya gaya. idol mo talaga ako.

miss na kita. see you on thursday, you weirdoo (:

everyone!
sapakin niyo nga ko. gisingin at papasukin.
"hoy bruha pumasok ka nga!"

nako ah. magtext ka. sapakan na toh.

*Sunday, December 04, 2005

JO-E NAKAKABADTRIP KA TALAGA!

i uploaded some pics from toni's debut, etc.
i'm still waaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiting for them.tagal. 0_O

rocky's been so useless these past few days.
not naman useless, he's just not there.
yan tuloy, i still haven't watched chicken little.
he better come on thursday or else,
bugbugan na toh! wala na ngang pasok eh!

so someone finally asks me to watch it, then 10 minutes later, it's goodbye.
BADTRIP! galit ako. swear. galit talaga.
i can't stand not talking to a person when i'm mad at them. (or happy with,alternatively)
i don't like leaving things hanging.
it's not officially goodbye, i know, but still!
ano namang klase yun diba?

"diba bula ako? [sabi mo]"
"so mawawala ka nalang bigla?"
"parang ganun na nga. you'll see."

wtf???
i'm mad, but at the same time, hurt.
as in affected ako. why???
sino ba naman tong taong toh???
uhhh...tao lang naman na you never thought you'd see again, but serendipitously did!
i'm hurt in the way that you'd want to shed a little tear.
i'm hurt because of that ^ bubble thing, not because of what was shared.
tuwang tuwa nga ko nung finally nasabi mo eh! patagotago pa kasi! ayos lang naman!

omg!!! i'm feeling something! i'm hurt! shite!
i'm kinda happy narin pala.
it's been so long since i've sincerely felt something, anything.
i admit, rocky has made me so numb, that
this wonderfully hurtful and deep feeling feels like a blessing.

i discovered just now that i have a stalker. hahahaha. joke lang mico (:

naman joe! di na ko sanay nang di ka nakakausap/kasama. shit ka naman eh. ayoko nga ng nagiging attatched/dependent in any way. too late. shit talaga. brought the physics book pa! shit ka tinapay! wag mo ko tirahin. manghahamon ng bullsession tapos magpapakamanok.bwiset! *really pissed*

*Friday, December 02, 2005

"hello silence" *wave* *laugh* - prof. acuna

geog 1 ko today.our task was to map the acad oval.saya noh?not!
my geog 1's 4-5:30. so wala nang araw. di na mainit. which is good naman.
but, as in wala na ngang araw. madilim na.
our group of seven was split into two.
the first group mapped the vendors/stalls in the inner acad oval.
the second group mapped the buildings in the outer acad oval.
i was part of the second group.
imagine that. umabot pa kami dun sa may damuhan na.
exercise yun! but i don't need it. naman. wala nang matitira sakin.
i was with carlo and jade by the way.
it was fun, but tiring (:
sabi ko nga. no need for jeepneys from now on. haha.
yeah. like that's gonna happen. maarte daw ako eh. haha. kayo kaya tumawid ng bakod. ako kaya ko (:

pabalik sa dorm with my geog buddy (who's a new inebriation mate btw)
$^#$@&**^$%#&^#$ argh! *confusingly inis mode*
i saw jo-e. why the heck was i in that mode??
period comin up?? haaayy. ayun. i saw jo-e in front of cantina. hindi nanaman uuwi yun. saya (:

prof. acuna really reminds me of papa.
he talks like him and even looks like him.
i can't help but listen to his "lectures".
but, Lord please, don't make him teach sa diliman. of all the places. please.
anyway, today's discussion was fun. indirectly titled-"the makings of an insane isko"
derived from something written by randy david. nakakahiya na nakakatawa. lolo ko pa naman yun (:

:) HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAAN!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOEY! (: