give me a hug.

*Thursday, January 18, 2007

since moving on sounds wrong...

i am moving to my LJ.

i am now HERE.

i'm still keeping this site but am not maintaining it.
bye. i loved you.

*Tuesday, January 16, 2007

baaakit bakit ba nung up fair blahblahblahkanta :)

"we were inlove together."

wooh. heavy stuff. may sasakit pa ba jan? i've been thinking about all the wrong things. That statement alone is the reason for all the joy and the pain. leave it to one of your boy friends to remind you of how "you were inlove with someone else back then." thank you for that trip down memory lane. nako, thank you talaga. haha. peace :)

so anyway, i'm blaming the lovapalooza-ish event on saturday for my current anguish. haha. i'm totally kidding ofcourse! because i'm inviting you:

UP JMA & Close-Up presents:
Paparazzi! Kissing Seen!
A Culminating Party for the Close-Up Lovapalooza PrintAd Contest!
January 20, Saturday, 10pm at Temple Bar GB2
Free Flowing San Mig Light, San Mig Strong Ice, Jack Daniels, Jaggermeister and more!
Php 250

The best-dressed couple wins a helicopter ride and a dinner date at Hotel Intercontinental!
Party pictures will be featured in Chalk magazine!

so pumunta na kayo. start your valentines right and early!
at dahil uso ang break-ups, it's a great venue to mingle with singles! hahaha. kidding :P

aj has a very good reason not to go, it's written up there and it has 3 letters, so don't think i'm pissed. there's always the ball. yey! basta let's bring dates so we can win that helicopter ride ok? :)

happy 19th birthday jannine!!!

i miss you so much :*

*Sunday, January 14, 2007

to "al"

i wonder where i put my else it was purely girls.
here's something i dug up. i guess it's a tad applicable for now:

because i may never have the privelege of being your friend after you've gone up and down: fallen and risen, unlike the others, is why i cry for you. i am selfish.

because i may never experience standing with you with unclenched fists and willing hearts is why i cry for you. i am a coward.

because i may never get to drink with you, with the absence of all the bitterness but the fermented yeast's, and your unsickly sweet laughter, is why i cry for you. i am wasted.

because i may never be held like i hold, paying with my soul in full, is why i cry for you. i am broke-n.

because i may never feel your adulterous caress, i remain yours.

uuuy. BALIKAN NA BA TO?

*Thursday, January 11, 2007

losing and making no sense at all.

it's like quitting smoking but you don't know you're puffing on the last stick you'll ever have.
i finished my last stick and i didn't even know it.

i know i should feel happy. i'm losing the habit that for so many months i've been trying to lose. but i don't feel happy. i lost. that's what i feel.

i lost and it's not even a game.

i was a basketball player about to retire but i didn't even know my age. to me, every game, every day was the first.

i lost and i wasn't even playing the game.

the game. i used to play it and i felt invincible... until the day i knew what invincible was.

why am i crying?
because there was invincibility.
because i lost.
but if there is still hope and i haven't really lost, i'm crying because i will lose... the one i cry for.

no sense. i'm not ok.

someone who looks like colin freakin farrel won't make things ok.
someone who drives you everywhere in a fancy car won't make things ok.
someone who buys you goddamn christmas havaianas won't make things ok.
someone who holds your hips and sways with you won't make things ok.
all you need is someone to love and love you back. then you'll be ok.

that someone will hug you too. give me a hug please :)

:* for always eydyey.

*Saturday, January 06, 2007

welcome 2007

so many things have happened this past year but you are right. we are living endless cycle cycles.